Not a thin girl……Yet

The story of how a not so thin girl goes from 260 to 130 pounds!

Not a thin girl is back..and still not thin 06/22/2010

Filed under: Day to day life,health issues,Weight issues — notathingirl @ 2:17 pm
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So I’m back now. I’m ready to get back on track…………….

So here I am back at the same place, with not as much to loose but with just as much frustration. So last year I joined spark and I went from 260 pounds to 169 pounds. It was a fun journey, I had more energy and it was nice to be closer to my goal. Then pretty much out of nowhere I had someone very close to me die suddenly of septic shock. It was pretty gruesome way to go, so it hit me kind of hard. Then I had an ovarian cyst the size of a baseball that had to be removed because it was cutting off my circulation (very painful), then mix that with the stress of my final year of nursing school and raising 2 small children. So I started going through a bad depression, and I started having bad anxiety. Long story short went to doc and got some anti-depressants, and anti-anxiety meds. They helped with the anxiety and the depression but I never felt satisfied with food. I was always hungry! At first it was okay because I hovered between 170 and 180 for about three months. Then woke up one morning and I was 190, then most recently 210 . But the problem with this medication, and yes weight gain is a side effect, is that it makes you so mellow that you loose that ump and that motivation to really want to loose weight. So that’s the problem where I should be running around working out and swearing off sweets, I’m still always hungry and like, “hey I’m only 210, not a big deal I’ll have more cake”. But I really enjoyed being thinner and I want to go back there. So despite feeling always hungry right now I’m gonna do it! I’m tapering off the meds, so that should help with my appetite. I think I will go walking today.
So even though I’m back here again, I will do it. I will loose the weight I regained and finally hit goal. This time around seems like it will be harder. But I am up for the challenge.

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The neverending week from hell 08/24/2009

Filed under: Day to day life,health issues — notathingirl @ 3:04 pm
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This past, and current week has been a neverending week from hell. So this will be a multible posting day. I have so much to update on. I will be posting about my intense pain, leading to a nightmare hospital experience, leading to me having to have emergency surgery. I will also include pictures from my sutures, and my tramatized arms (brusied and blown viens). I will also post about my grandfather being in critical condition in the ICU right now. As well as the doctor I menetentioned in my last post calling me on the phone today, and leading me in a very lively conversation. There’s so much to say, and update about. So in order not to have one extremely long post, I’m going to break it up into smaller posts throughout the day. Excuse any grammical errors, because my faitful spell checker in google chrome is on the fritz as well as the side effects of the little bottle of percot I have on hand. However I will try to keep it as legible as possible. But before I begin posting I just wanted to start off with a simple THANKS! I wanted to thank all that have visted my blog in my absense. Even though I have no idea who you are, in the days when I was in the hopsital I had at least 63 vistis to the blog on one day and many more on the following days. It is kind people out there that really move me, and inspire me. There are some really great people in the LJ community 100pounds2loose who have always been there for a helping hand, a pat on the back, and just general support. While I know no one knows everything but those ladies/gentelmen over there are very helpful with dieting advice, and just all over wisdom.  Many of times I have tured to them when I felt frustrated, disappointed, or just plain dissatified in this weight loss journey. There are even a few particular girls that even though I do not know them in real life, I feel for them as if they were friends. I root for them when they are doing well, and I feel their pain when they stumble. I just think its wonderful to be able to find support, understanding, and acceptance from so many people going through the same expriences as I am. There are so many great people on Sparkpeople that have been a great source of knowlege, motivation, and inspiration to me along this journey.  I get a lot of, “your an inspiration” comments from new members but little do they know they are the ones that motivate me.  It just touches my heart to know that there are so many good people out there trying, struggling, and fighting to succed at meeting their goals.  Its like I want for them to make it, I want us all to make it!  Not just in meeting our weight and fitness goals, but our life goals. It just amazes me how we may share a common thread with our struggles with weight or health and we still have that ability to give and make an inpact on each other’s lives.  Not just an inpact, but a meanigful inpact. With struggles with weight, we can have a lot of self esteem problems, or just really feel down in general but it’s great to know you aren’t alone, and no one has to stuggle in the dark or by themselves. You wouldn’t believe how many people have reached out to me for help or support. Feeling like there could not be a tomorrow, or feeling like a complete failure. Just to see that turn around, that glimmer of hope, that belief in themselves is truely meaningful. Personally I am beyound thankful for your support, inspiration, motivation, and understanding. Thank you!